Article by Anna D'Arcy, Life & Executive Coach, Seachange Now
Did you ever look back on the ‘near misses’ of your life? The job opportunity that you thought was the be all and end all that you didn’t get? The relationship that at the time, you thought it was ‘the one’ but broke your heart?
At the time these experiences that don’t turn out the way that we want them to, can feel like a failure to us. However, it is only a failure if we don’t get back up on the horse! When we are in the middle of this situation it is really hard to see the wood for the trees and we can get caught up in a ‘poor me’ mentality. And rightly so! It’s perfectly fine to take some time to wallow & feel sorry for yourself but the main thing is that you don’t spend too much time there.
When one door closes, another one opens – if we are staring too hard at the closed door in front of us then we might miss the opening door behind us. As Tony Robbins says – “energy flows where the focus goes” so when we are feeling sorry for ourselves and focusing too much on that closed door we are inviting more negativity into our lives. By dusting ourselves off and trying to find the learning in our ‘near misses’ we bring much more positive energy. And positivity is like Velcro – the more positive you are the more good things come your way and the more doors open for you.
Everything is an experiment. Only we, as the complex human beings that we are, decide whether it is a success or a failure. When you start to really believe that everything is an experiment you can choose to learn from it. For example, what would you do differently in the next interview for an even better job? Or what were the personality traits of that person that you would like to see in the next relationship that you enter into? There is a learning in everything, you just need to look for it.
As you can tell, I am quite fond of the old proverbs but it’s because usually they are true! There have been so many times in my life where things haven’t gone my way but pretty quickly something even better or more suited to me would land on my lap – one door closed and another one opened.
So take a bit of time to reflect on the ‘near misses’ of your life that have brought you to the place that you are right now. What did you learn from them? What did you do differently as a result of that experiment? Or if you are going through something difficult at the moment keep an eye out for that opening door & please remove ‘failure’ from your vocabulary – it is merely a future ‘near miss’. #coaching #seachangenow #nearmisses #meaningfullife www.seachangenow.ie firstname.lastname@example.org